"Inside Spinal Tap" - the discography

Thought I would share this as a follow-up to my recent Tap post, and since the books are hard to find nowadays...

The first attempt at compiling a Spinal Tap discography was in Peter Occhiogrosso's 1984 book "Inside Spinal Tap." While precious and few song titles were given, it was still an interesting and well-thought-out overview of their output, including singles. The 1992 edition of the book (updated to include coverage of "Break Like The Wind") featured a complete rewrite of the discography, replacing the descriptions of the releases with critical reviews.

Since both versions make for fun reading, I thought I would transcribe both of them here. Enjoy!

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[The notation "E1" refers to the original 1984 edition, while "E2" refers to the revised 1992 edition. I removed references to other areas of the book. My own personal notes, wherever an error should exist in Occhiogrosso's text, are marked with "SW".]

"Gimme Some Money" b/w "Cups and Cakes" (Abbey, 1965)
E1: 'Their first single, released under the name of the Thamesmen.'

"(Listen To The) Flower People" b/w "Rainy Day Sun" (Megaphone, 1967)
E1: 'First single as Spinal Tap, with Ronnie Pudding on bass.'

SPINAL TAP (Megaphone, 1967)
E1: 'Released in the U.S. as SPINAL TAP SINGS "(LISTEN TO THE) FLOWER PEOPLE" AND OTHER FAVORITES. First LP.'
E2: 'Clear, crisp, scintillating, the first fresh breath of a new dawn sweeping over the sludgy, self-satisfied rooftops of rock 'n' roll. Or was it a new, gritty realism putting the lie to the prettified homogeneity of early-Sixties "Bobbie" rock? Who cares? We know vintage gold when we smell it. What's really amazing is how well this stuff has aged. Our advice: Buy a few cases and lay them down in the cellar for your grandkids. Standouts include the mellow title track and the wryly portentous "Have a Nice Death," featuring a killer drum solo from "Stumpy" Pepys. A+'
SW: One of the big inconsistencies in both editions of the book is the identity of Tap's drummer at this point. It was *not* John "Stumpy" Pepys as Occhiogrosso seemed to believe, but rather, Eric "Stumpy Joe" Childs. (Pepys was the blond, geeky drummer seen in "Gimme Some Money.")

"(Again With The) Flower People" b/w "Break With The Wind [sic!]" (Megaphone, 1968)
E1: 'Derek Smalls replaces Pudding on bass.'
SW: As you might've guessed, 'With' should be 'Like'. The song title's appearance in the Heavy Metal Memories commercial confirms that this was always the case.

WE ARE ALL FLOWER PEOPLE (Megaphone, 1968)
E2: 'When a flower begins to fade, it gives off a faintly sickly smell, and much the same could be said for Tap's attempt to cash in on their surprisingly successful debut LP. If that one was premier cru Bordeaux, this was pure red ink. A few of the songs were molded around a questionable proto-concept: the story of a lad who, like ill-fated Icarus, decided that he would put on wings and fly - except that he would be a kind of human airliner and sell seats on himself to pay for the project. Needless to say, the boys were "heavy into acid" at the time. When sales proved as disappointing as the concept, the LP was retitled THE INCREDIBLE FLIGHT OF ICARUS P. ANYBODY and reissued minus the title track. The new title, however, proved eerily prophetic as far as chart position was concerned. C-'

THE INCREDIBLE FLIGHT OF ICARUS P. ANYBODY (Megaphone, 1968)
E1: 'Sort of a preconcept album-concept album. It was, in fact, a retitled version of the poorly selling WE ARE ALL FLOWER PEOPLE, minus the title track.'
SW: All other sources of Tap lore give the release date as 1969.

SILENT BUT DEADLY (Megaphone, 1969)
E1: 'Recorded live at the Electric Zoo, Whimpton. Although the legendary two-hour Tufnel/St. Hubbins guitar solo on "Short 'n' Easy" was included only in severely edited form, bootlegs of the entire thing are known to exist. (Our lips, however, are sealed.)'
SW: Though the song's title would even re-appear as "Short 'n' Easy" in the recent 'Official Compendium' book, Tap more often called this song "Short and Sweet", seen in both the 1992 edition and the lyrics of the song.
E2: 'Tap are, needless to say, the pre-eminent live band, as this LP, recorded at the Electric Zoo, Whimpton, conclusively hints. I say "hints" because, due to the classic shortsightedness of the button-down nerds at Megaphone, the meta-legendary two-hour Tufnel-St. Hubbins twin guitar solo on "Short and Sweet" was chopped to a niggardly 18:37. Fortunately, some bootlegs exist (see below), and despite poor sound quality, are worth ferreting out. Humorous highlight: the snap-crackle-pop sound effects during Nigel's spoken intro to "Breakfast of Evil." B+'

BRAINHAMMER (Megaphone, 1970)
E1: 'Incorrected listed as 1973 on the sound-track LP from the "rockumentary" THIS IS SPINAL TAP. This and the next couple of LPs are described by Nigel as being stylistically pre-glam rock, whatever that means.'
E2: 'Here the band has clearly hit their lumbering stride full tilt, moving with the lean, mean aplomb of a brontosaurus in fighting trim. "Big Bottom," one of their earliest evergreens, brilliantly foreshadows Queen's later lesser ode to the bum cheek, "Fat-Bottomed Girls." Allegations of sexism miss the point - as Derek once explained, the song doesn't demean women but merely a part of their anatomy. Also delectable for the sheer brute force of their execution are "Lie Back and Take It" and the sultry "Swallow My Love." A'

"Big Bottom" (Megaphone, 1970)
E1: 'From the Brainhammer LP this track brilliantly foreshadows Queen's later, lesser "Fat-Bottomed Girls."'

NERVE DAMAGE (Megaphone, 1971)

BLOOD TO LET (Megaphone, 1972)

INTRAVENUS DE MILO (Megaphone, 1974)
E2: 'Alas, a certain, how shall I say, sameness has set in during this period of the band's meteoric rise to the middle of the pack. Apart from a hard-rockin "Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight" and the devilishly witty deconstruction of Social Darwinism, "Saliva of the Fittest" on Intravenus, not much of substance has survived from this three-year musical backwater. But hey, they're entitled. B-'

"Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight" (Megaphone, 1974)
E1: 'After a two-year recording hiatus, Tap came back with the Intravenus LP and this single, which, for them, was relatively successful.'

THE SUN NEVER SWEATS (Megaphone, 1975)
E1: 'Tap's first full-blown concept LP, based on a somewhat skewed vision of the British Empire as a world-uniting force.'
E2: 'Ponderous is the word for this late-blooming concept album that only a Taphead could love, padded as it is with creaky period pieces ("Daze of Knights of Old") and too-precious Donovan knock-offs ("The Princess and the Unicorn," "The Obelisk"). Riding the rising tide of British chauvinism implied in the title, Tap end up sounding, in the words of the overwrought title song, like "the hardest concrete" that "never quite sets." But when Tap stumble, at least they stumble big. Their nostalgic orgy of Britannophilia, which also brought us the deathless mytho-historico-romance "Stonehenge," is further proof that this fine band's reach sometimes exceeded its gasp. "Even the biggest elephant never forgets," David sings; in sooth, prithee forget this one, lads. C'

"Stonehenge" (Megaphone, 1975)
E1: 'Although never officially released as a single from The Sun..., its popularity on AOR radio in the midst of conceptmania and British historophilia resulted in overpressing of DJ and promotional copies in several different lengths, of which the shortest and most palatable was collected on TIST (4:36).'

JAP HABIT (Megaphone, 1975)
E1: 'Tap's second live outing, this three-LP set recorded in the Far East was notable for being released in England with two pounds of gimmick packaging. The American version was cut to two disc sans the packaging. What with two albums and a single in one year, this was clearly a busy if unprofitable time for Tap.'
E2: 'Triple-live barnburner that shouts a loud banzai! in the face of anyone who had lost faith in Tap's ability to soldier through the dreariest of times. Other bands may have already been cranking out double and triple live LP's in Far Eastern venues, but Tap's is somehow, well, longer and louder than most. Former session drummer Peter "James" Bond provides a welcome (if short-lived) steadiness to the ever-turbulent percussion chair, and Ross MacLochness churns out some monster (no pun intended) keyboard riffs on the breakneck "Devil Take the Hindmost" and the dreamy instrumental "Nocturnal Mission." But "Nice 'n' Stinky" proved to be the sleeping time-bomb that would explode into unexpected mega-hitdom two years later in the US. B+'

BENT FOR THE RENT (Megaphone, 1976)
E1: 'Although it yielded the nearly classic "Heavy Duty," this LP marked an all-time low in record sales for the bandwagon-hungry band, and the beginning of the end of their contract with Megaphone. The details of that exchange of legal fusillades are will documented in the author's end-of-an-era tome Suit Countersuit (q.v.), and needs no further comment here.'
E2: 'With the exception of the memorably anthemic "Heavy Duty" ("No page in history, baby - that I don't need/I just want to make some eardrums bleed"), this tardy entry in the glitter-rock sweepstakes is best forgotten. Ask yourself if you really want to hear Tap perform titles like the ill-conceived glam-soul pastiche "When a Man Looks Like a Woman," or the New York Dolls/Mitch Ryder homage, "High Heels, Hot Wheels." Nor did the LP go very far toward paying David, Nigel, and Derek's respective rents, for that matter. C-'

[SW: In both books, TAP DANCING goes unmentioned, which raises a curious point later on.]

ROCK AND ROLL CREATION (Megaphone, 1977)
E1: 'An air of mystery surrounds this otherwise unremarkable album. Release dates vary, depending on whom you ask. For instance, the TIST sound-track compilation (which if you recall, erred on the Brainhammer date) lists this as 1977; yet the band's own discography (compiled, it's true, by latecomers at Polymer Records) places it between Blood To Let and Intravenus de Milo. Go figure. We favor the later date, as the notion of a vengeful Megaphone releasing these rather forgettable tracks, post-departure, rings true to us. The title track did garner modest airplay in England, but since the nation was in the throes of the Punk Explosion at the time, it was all but lost in the shuffle (or pogo, if you must). No loss, really, after all.'
SW: It's accepted that 1977 is indeed the release date for this album.
E2: 'Score one for the bean-counters. Tap may even have got the idea for the infamous SMELL THE GLOVE cover when their former label "rubbed their noses in it" by releasing this shoddy collection of rejected tracks after the band's much publicized lawsuit against Megaphone. Was it gratuitous irony on Megaphone's part to include an especially off-key version of the band's rarely performed punk excursion, "Young, Smug and Famous"? We won't dignify the bastards by giving this one a rating.'

"Nice 'n' Stinky" (Megaphone, 1977)
E1: 'Ironies within ironies, or in their end is their beginning. In one last apparent attempt to wring a few droplets of lucre from the desiccating fortunes of poor Spinal Tap, Megaphone released a "specially edited" version of this cut from the two-year-old, triple-live Jap Habit, based on a small underground buzz in Great Britain. Perhaps all they really wanted to do was rub Tap's noses in it, who knows? But fate made a last minute U-turn, the track became an unprecedented surprise hit in America, and the Band that Refused to Die sprang back to life.'

IT'S A SMALLS WORLD (Unreleased eight-track "super demo," c. 1978)
E1: 'Although never released - and probably with good reason - this solo work of Derek Smalls's, which arrived during the same period of "suspended animation" that gave birth to the [following] LP, must be noted here for completeness's sake. Derek's comments on the recording shed probably as much light as ever will be shed upon this darkest of dark Spinal Tap hours. Let's move on.'

NIGEL TUFNEL'S CLAM CARAVAN (Plutarch, 1979)
E1: 'After what is politely referred to in the industry as "Le debacle Megaphone," the band retreated to Nigel's castle in Scotland, reportedly to ponder their future and pursue solo projects, of which this was the only one to see the light of day. Tufnel himself has been famously reticent on this LP - at least until recently. As it turns out, his memory is not much more revealing than the mists of myth and rumor.'
E2: 'Ah, yes, the solo albums, product of Tap's banishment from Megaphone and their near-legendary sojourn in Nigel's Scottish castle. To be perfectly honest, the infelicitously mistitled CLAM CARAVAN (the label should've read "Calm") is right up there with such fish-out-of-water efforts as Bill Wyman's A STONE ALONE and Ross MacLochness's DOESN'T ANYBODY HERE SPEAK ENGLISH? Just as MacLochness's solo LP sprang from his experience of missionary work in Namibia, Nigel's exotic sound-trip to the North African desert seems to emerge from some dark, arid patch of his troubled psyche. If this is any indication of the sheer torpor of Tap's collective dark night of the soul, it's probably just as well that Derek's solo opus, IT'S A SMALLS WORLD, never saw the flourescent light of record stores. C-'

SHARK SANDWICH (Polymer, 1980)
E1: 'Without missing a beat (a rarity for them), Spinal Tap picked up a new drummer, Mick Shrimpton, from an ex-Eurovision Song Contest house band. Replacing Peter ("James") Bond (a victim of spontaneous onstage combustion during the "Isle of Lucy" Jazz & Blues Festival) with Mick, Tap signed a new contract with Polymer Records (a Polydor subsidiary), and released this LP, as well as their first new single in over four years.'
E2: 'Having languished a significant three years in the tomb-like limbo of contractual lawsuits and solo meanderings, Tap are luminously resurrected here with a new label, a new direction, and (natch) a new drummer. A joyously nihilistic "No Place Like Nowhere" and their late-disco hit "Throb Detector" lead the way. But the sheer suggestive brilliance of "Sex Farm" presages their eventual ascension into Heavy Metal Heaven. Who needs the self-serving "Wild Man" posturings of today's trendy Iron John set when we can hear Tap singing about real men swinging real pitchforks? You'd have to go clear back to Breughel for an equally heady brew of hardworking everyman earthiness and primal barnyard lust. We can almost see the steam rising off the cow chips on this one. A+'

"Sex Farm" (Polymer, 1980)
E1: 'Not nearly as controversial as the earlier "Big Bottom," standards of permissiveness having inevitably relented a bit, this still caused enough of a ripple to reestablish Tap among the more offensively obvious of heavy metal misogynist bands. And why not?'

SMELL THE GLOVE (Polymer, 1982)
E1: 'The album that relaunched Tap as an American touring-band phenomenon. Oddly, all their press material of this period referred to Smell as the band's seventeenth album, though even if you count the Smalls nonrelease, you still come up with only sixteen. Which has led some observers (not to mention record collectors) to scour their memories and not a few cutout bins in search of that missing seventeenth. In all, the fuss over that nearly buried the controversy about the suppressed "sexist" cover.'
SW: The 'missing seventeenth' is TAP DANCING.
E2: 'They may have come out of the depths, but their reminiscences of that tedious time still burn on in the thundering "Hell Hole." Yet the band seem curiously ambivalent: are they glad to be out of a place where "the rats are peeling," or are they even more nauseated by the high life they've regained, however briefly ("The sauna's drafty, the pool's too hot/The kitchen stinks of boiling snails")? You figure it out. As for the notoriously suppressed cover and lurid title track, gimme a break! Tap as misogynists? Smell this, buddy! B+'
SW: This has been the only mention of a title track for this LP; even the discography in the back of the 'Official Compendium' fails to mention this. A discography very similar to the one in that book appears on the semi-official SpinalTapFan.com, and does include the title track, but this was added after I pointed out its mention in the 1992 edition of "Inside."

HEAVY METAL MEMORIES
E1: 'Pictures of this album's cover exist - one can be glimpsed on the inner sleeve of TIST, in fact - but the record itself appears to be strangely nonexistent. Rumored to have been a compilation album of some of Tap's earlier "glories," it may have been released by Megaphone during the band's well-known recording hiatus. Or it may simply be a pirate recording. Unfortunately, even the members of ST don't quite remember the facts surrounding this elusive platter, now merely another page in rock history's palimpsest. So be it.'
SW: This is odd, especially given that the faux TV commercial for this was produced shortly before this book. Apparently someone didn't tell Occhiogrosso about that! (No mention is made at all in the second edition.) Anyway, the accepted info on this LP was that it was a 1983 release on Metalhouse records, containing all of Tap's classics.

THIS IS SPINAL TAP - THE SOUNDTRACK (Polymer, 1984)
E2: 'More of a greatest hits package - albeit with many of their later tunes given new live treatments - than a bold step forward. Still, the LP does have one unassailable advantage over most of the others reviewed here: IT'S STILL IN PRINT! A-'
SW: The 'new live treatments' statement is hard to decipher, given that these are studio recordings; but fans agree that the modern sound of some tracks such as "Big Bottom" show that they must be re-recordings, and not the versions originally heard on their source albums.

BREAK LIKE THE WIND (Dead Faith/MCA, 1992)
E2: 'Tap's first new LP in a decade presents both the ultimate enigma and the ultimate challenge to their credibility. Daringly interlarding hot new tracks in the band's reborn molten metal style ("Bitch School," "Cash on Delivery") with classic period pieces ("The Sun Never Sweats," "Clam Caravan," "All the Way Home"), BLTW offers a uniquely valuable panorama of the band's development. But it also begs the question, Have Tap Sold Out? Squeaky clean production values, all-star guest soloists like Jeff Beck, Steve Lukather, Dweezil Cappa, and Cher(!), flawless engineering, and socially relevant issues raging from ecology ("Stinking Up the Great Outdoors") to euthanasia ("Track 13") - are these the qualities we've come to expect from England's Loudest Band? The real payoff just may be "Rainy Day Sun," a deliriously psychedelic foreshadowing of Kinks/Small Faces/Beatles modalities that was the original B-side of "Flower People." The story is that the 1967 tune was yanked by the band after "I Am the Walrus" and "Itchycoo Park" came out, so as "not to cause confusion in the marketplace," and was never included on its debut LP. How fitting that Tap's one legitimate chance to be ahead of its time ended up as an obscure collector's item until 25 years after its time! Overall, I'm strongly ambivalent about this one, but I'll give it the benefit of the doubt; as with the previous LP, you can actually buy it in stores. A'

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[In addition, the 1992 printing added an additional section containing reviews of five Tap bootlegs, as follows.]

AUDIBLE DEATH (Gaswind, 1969)
'Sounds like someone had a small cassette recorder in about the 50th row of the Electric Zoo the same day Silent But Deadly was recorded. Audio quality is zilch, and the constant sound of someone choking on what must have been incredible bad dope is distracting, but it's worth a shot, if only for the justly famous two-hour "Short and Sweet."'

LIVE AT BUDOKKAN (Japtap, 1975)
'In case you didn't get enough to feed your JAP HABIT, this Budokkan's for you. Stellar acoustics, although some overheated fan keeps screaming Bonzai! in the middle of Nigel's guitar solos. A mixed blessing, but more blessed than mixed.'

GOT THAMESMEN ON TAP (Merseybleat, ND)
'If our ears don't lie, this is historic stuff, with Ronnie Pudding and a pre-gardening accident "Stumpy" Pepys in top form. Early hits and a cool smattering of cover versions, purportedly taped in an underground club in Rotterdam. On the other hand, it may just be an incredible simulation, which pretty much amounts to the same thing.'

IT'S A DUB WORLD (Skaface, 1979?)
'The bass tracks only to Derek's never-released solo LP, somehow pirated from the studio where he was working at the time. Lets the imagination run wild.'

OPENFACED MAKO (Hammerhead, 1980)
'A collection of outtakes from the SHARK SANDWICH sessions, replete with some very revealing in-studio banter (near-fistfights would be more like it!). A real must, especially for the never-released, XXX-rated version of "Sex Farm." Naughty, naughty.'

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Just a note about "Smell The Glove" being the seventeenth album... excluding the solo albums, and the retitled version of WAAFP, this is still possible - at least in terms of what the Tap mythos dictated by this point:

1. Spinal Tap Sings "(Listen To The) Flower People" and Other Favorites (1967)
   
2. We Are All Flower People (1968) / The Incredible Flight Of Icarus P. Anybody (1969)
3. Silent But Deadly (1969)
4. Brainhammer (1970)
5. Nerve Damage (1971)
6. Blood To Let (1972)
7. Intravenus de Milo (1974)
8. The Sun Never Sweats (1975)
9. Jap Habit (1975)
10. Bent For The Rent (1976)
11. Tap Dancing (1976)
12. Rock and Roll Creation (1977)
    
13. Flak Packet (unreleased album not mentioned in IST, date unknown)
14. Lusty Lorry (unreleased album not mentioned in IST, date unknown)
15. Here's More Tap (unreleased album not mentioned in IST, date unknown)
16. Shark Sandwich (1980)
    
17. Smell The Glove (1982)
    

After all, why count Derek's unreleased album if Tap's unreleased albums (all likely from the Megaphone era) are ignored? However, a possible snag appeared later on, as the late-90's Spinal Tap CD-Rom added another unreleased album to the canon: an apparent soundtrack to a movie called "SEXX!" It could be, though, that this project occurred between 1984 and 1992.

Confusingly, Tap claim on their Joe Franklin Show appearance that the "Spinal Tap" soundtrack, not "Smell The Glove", is their seventeenth album. This would leave the count as such:

1. Spinal Tap Sings "(Listen To The) Flower People" and Other Favorites (1967)
   
2. We Are All Flower People (1968) / The Incredible Flight Of Icarus P. Anybody (1969)
3. Silent But Deadly (1969)
4. Brainhammer (1970)
5. Nerve Damage (1971)
6. Blood To Let (1972)
7. Intravenus de Milo (1974)
8. The Sun Never Sweats (1975)
9. Jap Habit (1975)
10. Bent For The Rent (1976)
11. Tap Dancing (1976)
12. Rock and Roll Creation (1977)
13. Nigel Tufnel's Clam Caravan (Nigel, 1979)
14. Shark Sandwich (1980)
    
15. Smell The Glove (1982)
16. Heavy Metal Memories (1983)
17. This Is Spinal Tap (1984)
    

OR, if one didn't want to count Nigel's solo album, they could accept "Icarus P. Anybody" as its own separate album, also bringing the soundtrack to seventeen.

Take your pick.

Spinal Tap's "Jap Habit" - a real album!!

Yes, you heard me correctly.

The rarest item produced in relation to "This Is Spinal Tap" was the band's supposed 1975 live album, "Jap Habit". Only a handful exist (intended only for select members of the cast and crew), but the recipients received both the UK and US variations described in the band's back story - and yes, the 'UK' package was just as legend described it, with three LP's, a paper kimono, and samples of tuna sushi.

I learned about this when contacting record collectors in and around the Pittsburgh area in search of the "Break Like The Wind" picture disc. One collector (no, their name will not be revealed here) loved Spinal Tap, and had built up an enormous collection of material related to the band - including a battered "Jap Habit" set, which he purchased for a very high amount from a friend whose father worked on "This Is Spinal Tap." I mentioned that, at the time, I was working on a discography of Tap's fictional back catalogue, and he said that he was willing to let me listen to both versions of the album and take notes, so long as I didn't record it in some way. I said that was fine.

A week or so later, my parents dropped me off at a small apartment not far from the South Side; thankfully, the treasure trove of Tap in front of me made it worthwhile, because his apartment was small, disgusting, and had a ridiculously strong pot smell no matter where you went. But, nitpicking aside, I was able to take notes. So without further ado, allow me to describe the contents of "Jap Habit".

First, the UK version. Housed in the black cardboard box (think something like the LP box of "All Things Must Pass" but a little thicker) were three genuine albums, as follows. And if you're wondering, no, the sushi samples were no longer intact. :-P (The package still reeked of them, though, so I'm guessing that it was years before the father got around to throwing them away.)

I wanted to be as thorough as possible, since this was a one-off opportunity, so I transcribed the banter as well. Enjoy!

SIDE ONE

• Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight
• David St. Hubbins: "We're going to kick things off with another little number from the album before this last one, called 'Intravenus De Morphine'..."
• Intravenus de Milo [yes, a song by this title!]
• Saliva Of The Fittest
• Swallow My Love
• David St. Hubbins: "Here's a tune for all the ladies in the house, so feel free to shower the stage with knickers and aphrodesiacs..."
• Big Bottom

SIDE TWO

• David St. Hubbins: "Let's take a bit of a nostalgia trip, shall we?"
• Gimme Some Money
• (Listen To The) Flower People
• Break Like The Wind
• David St. Hubbins: "Feel free to sing along with this one. It's called 'We Are All Flower People.'"
• We Are All Flower People
• The Incredible Flight Of Icarus P. Anybody

SIDE THREE

• Brainhammer
• Lie Back And Take It
• Nerve Damage
• Blood To Let
• David St. Hubbins: "Are you ready for another visit from the Goddess Intravenus?"
• Rock and Roll Nightmare [I'm assuming that this song was meant to be from 'Intravenus de Milo', though no official discography describes it as such.]

SIDE FOUR

• Band Intros
• David St. Hubbins: "Anyone here want to help us stink up the Budokkan?"
• Nice 'N' Stinky
• Silent But Deadly
• David St. Hubbins: "We'd like to give you a taste of the album we're working on at the moment, so to get you jumping in anticipation, here's a little heavy duty rock 'n' roll featuring Mr. Nigel Tufnel, MBE on lead guitar..."
• Heavy Duty [featuring a lengthy Nigel solo]
• David St. Hubbins: "Nigel Tufnel, ladies and gentlemen!"

SIDE FIVE

• David St. Hubbins: "This is a little suite of songs from our new album, called 'The Sun Never Sweats'.... it's an educational piece about Britannia. I hope you enjoy it."
• Daze Of Knights Of Old
• The Sun Never Sweats
• Devil Take The Hindmost
• Nocturnal Mission [an instrumental, with pounding drums - resembled something from a movie score]
• Stonehenge
• David St. Hubbins: "Thank you, Japan! Hope to see you again soon!"

SIDE SIX

• Rockin' Robin
• Short 'N' Sweet [long version, around 15 minutes]
• David St. Hubbins: "We love you all! Good night and may the Devil bless all of you!"

From this tracklist, you can see where the titles in Tap's scanty official discography (seen in the back of the "TIST: Official Companion" book originated from; those were the songs that were actually written. (It makes one sad to think that we could've gotten these instead of remakes of familiar songs on "Back From The Dead". Oh well... perhaps a future album?)

Now, onto the "US version". This one had the same front and back covers as were pasted onto the UK box, but this time, the album had no goodies, and was housed in a simple gatefold sleeve.

SIDE ONE

• Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight
• David: 'Intravenus de Morphine' banter
• Intravenus de Milo
• Swallow My Love
• Big Bottom
• David: 'nostalgia trip' banter
• (Listen To The) Flower People

SIDE TWO

• Break Like The Wind
• The Incredible Flight of Icarus P. Anybody
• Brainhammer
• Blood To Let
• David: 'Goddess Intravenus' banter
• Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare

SIDE THREE

• David: 'educational piece' banter
• Daze Of Knights Of Old
• The Sun Never Sweats
• Devil Take The Hindmost
• Nocturnal Mission
• Stonehenge [followed by 30 seconds of applause, rather than the farewell from the UK version]

SIDE FOUR [Essentially, this version creates a fake 'encore' by combining material from the fourth UK side with an edited "Short 'N' Sweet".]

• Band Intros
• David: 'stink up the Budokkan' banter [edited rather awkwardly onto the end of the band intros]
• Nice 'N' Stinky
• Heavy Duty
• Short 'N' Sweet [edited down to seven minutes]
• David: 'thank you Japan' banter [originally from UK side five - replaces the 'Devil blessing' that originally ended the album]

One thing I couldn't determine from listening to these was whether or not it was an actual live performance, though I'm sure that I was just hearing overdubbed applause. (If Tap actually held a concert where they played a wealth of material otherwise unavailable on their legitimate albums, *someone* in attendance would have either recorded it or spoken about it. The 1984 concert held to promote the movie, wherein they played "Rockin' Robin", is circulating amongst fans.)

I just can't stress enough how wonderful it would be to have an official CD release of this finally, especially if the guys don't plan on making a true follow-up to "Back From The Dead".

Time will tell, I suppose.

Incidentally, if any other 'back catalogue' albums are found to exist, please let me know! (I've heard rumblings about "Smell The Glove", but given the confusion between that and the soundtrack LP because of their similar covers, it's possible that someone was just mistaken.)

The Rocky Horror game you never saw

Computer games, the couple that have been made on the subject, haven't been particularly kind to Rocky Horror. What version of Rocky the "Rocky Interactive Horror Show" was supposed to be based on, I have no idea. (The characters, and the castle, are VERY vague resemblances to those of the movie - and this was a game made with Richard O'Brien's involvement. I assume it was based on a stage version?) But, in 2000, I tried to make the situation even worse.

At the time, folks were still making variations of "ZZT", an INCREDIBLY cheap-looking DOS game that used ASCII characters for graphics - the protagonist being an ASCII smiley face. The game had a built-in 'world editor' that allowed you to design your own ZZT environments. I decided to create "The Rocky Horror ZZT Show". And God, was it terrible. (I could use the excuse that I was only thirteen and dumb, but I won't waste my time.)

Here are a few screen captures - you can click to enlarge them.

"Crappy" was a pretty decent description.

The foyer.... check out the size of that elevator. Walking into the grandfather clock took you into a couple pages of misinformation-filled text about the movie.

The ballroom. The "green door" text was a desperate attempt to get people to check out locations in the proper order of the movie - but honestly, I'm so thankful I didn't let other people see this back when I actually thought it was *good*. :-P

This drawing. The biggest insult to Frank ever made by a fan, ever.

The lab, accessed (of course) through the elevator. As you might've guessed, all the little smiley faces represent Transylvanians...

With complete disregard for proper chronology, viewing the monitor in the lab during what was meant to be Rocky's creation shows you wonderful artistic interpretations of the bedroom scenes.

Frank and Rocky's bedroom. Frank (the dark blue smiley) tells you to get out.

Skipping forward a little bit (everything takes about five minutes total to go through, as it really isn't much of a game), this is the Rocky/Janet reveal.

Dinner scene. To progress, you have to go visit Columbia. I apologize to Nell for what's coming.

Not only is THIS meant to be Columbia (yes, I considered putting a red dot in her shirt rip), but she talks like a cross between Nurse Ansalong (who appears elsewhere in the game, for no reason) and a four year old. Want me to make this even more painful? I was gonna have a mini game that you played on Columbia's Nintendo. It was called "Destroyer 2: The Destruction of Denton!" I couldn't get it to work properly.

Hell with "Planet Schmanet Janet" - here's "Walk Like An Egyptian"!

Statues. Obviously, Brad was hideously mangled before being Medusa'd. This is as far as I got.

There's a little bit more to see, but honestly.... you don't want to. You really, really don't want to. I mean, if I had the ability, I'd make a first person Rocky game where you could navigate a sweet 3D castle, but I can't. For now at least.

"Ghost Hunters"... can it be saved, or should we play TAPS?

Despite being the major trigger in the 'ghost hunting show' craze, it has become very apparent to me, having watched the show from the beginning, that the fifth season of "Ghost Hunters" has paled greatly in comparison to recent episodes of copycat shows like "Ghost Adventures" and relative newcomer "Ghost Lab".

First though, before I get into what's wrong, I do need to commend the show for the problems that *have* been fixed over time:

1) Psychics and demonologists. As TAPS doesn't normally believe in psychics, I'm not sure why they were on the first couple seasons; but their presence can really bring the credibility of a show down. Look at "Paranormal State."

2) The ridiculous subliminal crap in the first couple seasons. No, TAPS isn't really to blame for this; they've said in the past that they can't control Sci-Fi's editing. And being that Sci-Fi like to drown out TAPS's audio with horror movie music, I'll place the blame for this failed experiment on them.

3) Overabundance of drama instead of ghost hunting. This really, really spoiled the first couple seasons - the Willard Library episode especially. While I do realize that there were personality conflicts going on at the time, it just didn't seem appropriate to spend so much time focused on them.

Now, here's my list of suggestions as to how this show could be saved from its current plight. These are based on my own personal observations - if you have anything else to add (or argue), please do.

1) STOP THE SPINOFFS. "Ghost Hunters Academy" was a disaster, and I can actually say that I have never seen anyone that *didn't* agree with this opinion. (I checked. Good God, I checked.) Besides the fact that the college kids recruited for this show were incredibly hard to watch, they brought out the worst in Steve and Tango. It's unsettling to see the guys that have been the comic relief for the last few seasons of "Ghost Hunters" get so pissed off all the time, to the point where they just seem mean.

2) Whatever happened to investigating private homes? The most memorable episodes of seasons past were in the houses of ghost-troubled families. When's the last time we saw anything to match the torso sitting in the rocking chair, or the vibrating attic?

3) Stop with the "we can see it, but no one else can" stuff. This really made the last episode (the Hindenburg crash site) difficult to watch. I'm not bashing TAPS here, because I'm willing to believe that they DID see something; but I think this also ties in with the need for smaller, more private locations. When something is spotted a quarter mile across an aircraft hangar, we're not gonna see it, because their night vision cameras just aren't that powerful. Anything outside of a 20 foot range is blackness to us. In closer quarters, we'd see stuff all the time - the shadow in the bar a couple weeks ago was great proof of that. The Sci-Fi (I'm sorry, SYFY) cameramen also need to stop shooting directly at someone when they point and say "Look over there!" If they're looking at something, friggin' point the camera at it, not at Grant! If they were less focused on filming the living people and more on the possibility of a dead one, we might've actually seen the face Grant saw in that underground prison. (Actually, no, that's a bad example, because it was a completely unexpected incident; if the camera was already pointing at that hole before Grant looked there, it would've seemed staged. And James Randi worshippers would've been pleased that their holy leader blessed them with such wonderful evidence that ghosts don't exist.)

4) I could be wrong about this, so excuse my theorizing here... but I get the distinct feeling that SYFY is telling Kris what to wear in order to "sexy" the show up. I personally like Kris, and I would feel terrible if this were true.

Now, I like "Ghost Adventures" and "Ghost Lab" just as much as I like "Ghost Hunters", but they DID come around much later, and I'm willing to stay loyal to TAPS come what may. I would hate to see the popularity of another network's copycat idea drag down the show that originally sparked everyone's interest, all over problems that are easy to fix.

My biggest fear is that, since they've spent the last five of their twenty years in TAPS in a much larger public eye than before, Jason and Grant are getting tired of the constant "You faked this / you're a bunch of liars" bullshit. I mean, for example, people are just NOT WILLING to let the jacket pull from the Halloween episode go. Would YOU get excited over finding something new if you knew that no one was going to believe you, time after time after time? Probably not. (Remind me to post my "TAPS wouldn't fake evidence, and here's why" list. Not that the thicker people of the Internet would pay attention to reason.)

While I do know that there is a sixth season in the works, I'd hate to see Jason and Grant leave one day and let Steve and Tango take over. As much as I like Steve and Tango (and they've been missed over the past few episodes where they were away doing GHA), it wouldn't be Ghost Hunters without the two guys that started everything.

That's my two cents.

Crazy Dream Theater - BATHROOMS! BATHROOMS EVERYWHERE!

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WARNING: The post you are about to read is *NOT* for the
easily nauseated. I'm serious. You're walking into some
seriously sick territory here. Please take caution before
reading further.
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Note - If you came here to read about the Bee Gees' albums, let me link you to the three sections of that post so you don't have to scroll through what I discuss below to find them.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
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You still wanna give it a chance? Alright, suit yourself.

I realized something. A recurring element of my dreams is, oddly enough, public restrooms. And usually not pleasant ones. Dirty, nasty, vile public restrooms. Maybe because I've actually *seen* my share of dirty, nasty, vile public restrooms. Remember Michael Jackson's story about the bathroom in prison that had "doo doo and feces" everywhere? I've been in places like that. God, I have been in places like that.

Just to show what I mean about them being a recurring element of my dreams, here's a few of the past mental washrooms I've visited:

• A bathroom on the bottom floor of some sort of high school, with a very, very strange set-up - no stalls, just a big room with a vast network of pipes, attached to which were rows of toilets facing each other. Now, if that's not weird enough, the toilets were elevated a few feet off the ground.
• A bathroom in what I assume was a [department store I won't name]... this one haunted me for days. Very dark and badly lit room; the middle of the three toilets was broken and spraying water out of the stall; oh yes, and there was SHIT EVERYWHERE. I could go into so much detail, because this one is indelibly burned into my mind. I won't. Oddly enough, shortly after this in real life, I encountered a bathroom in [department store I won't name] that was in close competition with this imaginary one.
• This one's from years ago... see, when I was younger, I used to be sort of afraid of fans. I had a dream that my family was in a furniture store or something, and upstairs, they had one of those little single-toilet bathrooms where you have to lock the door. 'Cept this one had an odd trait about it - an enormous grate on the wall, behind which was a vast fan/air conditioning system of some kind, in some sort of lit, tiled hallway. There's a giant fan you have to pass not long into the second half of "Portal" that reminds me of this.
• Some sort of extremely creepy, dark, red lit restroom (this one's popped up a couple times - once it was in a museum, another time it was in a locker room?) with a similar affliction of human produce as the second one I mentioned above. No, I don't want a psychologist telling me why I have dreams about shitty public restrooms. I already know that's strange.
• Multiple restrooms where the stalls didn't exactly offer privacy - either multiple toilets were in one stall (I'VE ACTUALLY SEEN THIS IN A REAL-LIFE SCHOOL!), or there was a side panel missing, and people passing by the stall on that side could see you.

OK, so onto the strangeness of last night's dream. No, shit isn't involved.

I was in a vast library of some sort, with a few floors. On the top floor, there was an alcove off to the left with bathrooms. 'Cept instead of a water fountain (which you would expect to be in such an area), there was a urinal, right out in the open. And there weren't just two bathrooms (or three, 'cause some places have a handicapped-only one or a "family room" - okay, or four, if they have one specifically for children, which I've seen a couple times also), there were many.

To the right, upon entering this little side area, were two doors - "Men" and "Bathroom". Being a curious type, I chose "Bathroom". I walked into a tiled restroom that was MUCH larger than it could have possibly been on the outside. (A TARDIS restroom, if you will.) There were a dozen stalls, and a lot of people (both genders) in here. Even stranger, there were a hell of a lot of hand dryers all over the wall. Sort of. Some worked properly, some dispensed soap, some sprayed water. After visiting this bizarre room, I went in the "Men" door, and found it a lot more normal.

The more I explored this alcove (it branched off into hallways on either side), the more restrooms I found. One had a Super Mario Bros. theme... and no visible toilets, just a lot of pipes and mushrooms. (Maybe you were meant to use the pipes? Knowing my dreams, probably.) After this, I don't remember what else happened. Sorry...

The moral of this all? Public bathrooms weird me the fuck out.

God, I feel like I need to take a shower now. A long shower. Uh, but not in a public shower.

The Bee Gees' albums... how many? (part 3)

Once more into the trench....

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ROBIN GIBB SOLO

[?] MY OWN WORK (1969)
Ah, here's one that most fans probably haven't heard about; the only mention I've ever seen was on Joseph Brennan's Gibb Songs site, where information is scattered. In a nutshell, this was apparently an album Robin was working on not long before "Robin's Reign", and in a 1969 interview, he revealed the 11-song tracklist. The entire thing was scrapped (none of it appeared on "Robin's Reign"), and most of the songs have yet to even make it to a bootleg. Perhaps this never got past a rough plan, and the material wasn't actually recorded??

[1] ROBIN'S REIGN (1970)
This came out instead. As Robin was no longer a member of the Bee Gees, this was the direct competition to Barry and Maurice's "Cucumber Castle" LP.

[?] SING SLOWLY SISTERS (1970)
After the relative success of "Robin's Reign" (and the official disintegration of the Bee Gees), Robin recorded this lushly orchestrated, downbeat album - another entry into the lost 'solo trilogy' of 1970. A tracklist was allegedly decided upon, but like the other brothers' recordings from this time period, this was scrapped when the group decided to reform for "2 Years On."

[2] HOW OLD ARE YOU? (1983)
[3] SECRET AGENT (1984)
[4] WALLS HAVE EYES (1985)
Three released solo albums. Sort of. While "Secret Agent" was indeed Robin alone, "How Old Are You" is much closer to being a Robin and Maurice LP (to the point of Maurice even providing lead vocals in places), and "Walls Have Eyes" includes both Maurice and Barry.

[5] MAGNET (2003)
Robin's solo projects went totally quiet during the remainder of the Bee Gees' time as a threesome; this emerged after the group's final disintegration. Unfortunately, instead of a strict pop album, Robin decided to make this one hip-hop. Robin, a middle-aged white Englishman, sings songs about getting freaky in the shower and sipping Cris. Why, God, why??

[?] LIVE (2005)
Another entry into the Bee Gees' live album canon.... as painful as it is. Even above "Magnet," this is truly the weakest Gibb-related release ever, displaying both Robin's complete massacre of Bee Gees tunes (including those written by and tailored for Barry), and an absolutely unprofessional mix that renders this disc bootleg quality.

[6] MY FAVORITE CHRISTMAS CAROLS (2006)
But that's forgiven, because this album is absolutely fantastic! :-) Strangely, the complete album was only released in Germany; some countries removed Robin's composition "Mother of Love", while only Germany included the very out-of-place tracks "Christmas Eve or Halloween" (a Bee Gees recording from 1968) and "Ellan Vannin".

[7?] 50 ST. CATHERINE'S DRIVE (2010?)
Whether this will be released is still unknown. A finished version of the album was filed with the US copyright office in 2008, though Robin is said to have revised the tracklist since then. Something to look forward to in the future I suppose.

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MAURICE GIBB SOLO

[?] (UNTITLED SYNTHESIZER ALBUM) (1969?)
A collaboration with Ringo Starr. According to the Gibbs' official biography, for a couple years, Maurice and Ringo were planning an avant garde album of bizarre Moog tracks. The only known title from this project is "Modulating Maurice," which featured Maurice saying random phrases over Ringo's instrumental backing. (Despite popular belief, this track has never been bootlegged; this song title was given to an unrelated Bee Gees instrumental.) I actually seem to remember hearing that the tapes for this album no longer exist, but don't take my word on that.

[?] SING A RUDE SONG (1969)
This one is a toughie, as it's not *technically* a Maurice album. While he was pushed as one of the stars of this London musical, he is only audible on three songs, though he is featured on the cover (shades of "Saturday Night Fever"), and produced the entire album. If this can be counted, this would actually be Maurice's only released work to date.

[?] THE LONER (1970)
Maurice's entry into the unreleased 1970 trilogy. In a perfect world, this fantastic album will emerge on a long-overdue compilation of Maurice's recordings (why one wasn't released after his passing, I don't know), but again, time will tell. Sadly, bootleg versions are poor quality; but the original Japanese boot (which thankfully is presented without the extreme sound reduction used on the later edition) is still essential listening.

[??] STRINGS AND THINGS (1981)
An album of synthesizer-based instrumentals, which doesn't seem to have ever been finished, as only a few song titles and one actual track (which may or may not be the title track) have emerged. Judging from that one song alone, this could have been an impressive disc.

[?] A BREED APART (1984)
One of Maurice's film scores. This soundtrack LP, available as a bootleg, was originally set for release in 1984 alongside the film. However, the film was delayed until 1986, and failed to make a splash upon release. The proposed soundtrack was scrapped.

[??] THE SUPERNATURALS (1985)
Though this was a finished work (another film score, to be precise), I'm putting it in the 'two question marks' category, as a release may have never actually been planned. Though Maurice's score appeared in some copies of the film (and Maurice actually has an on-screen cameo), the common version replaces his score with that of another composer. Thus, while it's possible that a soundtrack LP by Maurice could have been considered very early on, it most likely never went beyond the consideration phase. The reason it's even worth including here is that bootleggers actually took it upon themselves to release a CD of Maurice's score, obviously recorded directly from the film, in a deceptively legitimate-looking cover.

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ANDY GIBB
While Andy was not technically a Bee Gee, as he did not appear on any of their released material, he is still a Brother Gibb, and as such, his work is often included alongside that of the other three in discographies.

[?] (UNTITLED ALBUM) (1975)
While his older brothers were enjoying the start of their disco heyday, Andy was in Australia, trying to launch a career. He did manage to release one single there ("Words and Music"), which could have possibly been the title track of this album. Unfortunately, though this seems to have been completed, nothing else has emerged of this project.

[1] FLOWING RIVERS (1977)
[2] SHADOW DANCING (1978)
[3] AFTER DARK (1980)
Andy's brief output, cut short by his alarming use of drugs. By 1980, his ability to perform had deteriorated in such a way that Barry had to step in, with the result that "After Dark" is really an uncredited collaboration between the two - even including Barry on vocals (doing his best Andy impression) when Andy's cocaine-worn abilities were not sufficient.

[?] IT'S MY NEIGHBORHOOD (aka MAN ON FIRE) (1988)
Throughout the Eighties, Andy announced several times that he was planning a comeback album. This seems to be the most successful attempt, as it was actually given a title (which sources are unsure about - Gibb Songs calls it "It's My Neighborhood", while the official biography of the Bee Gees claims that that title was later changed to "Man On Fire.") A handful of songs are known to exist, and it seemed that Andy might've been onto something here, finally... until his death of heart disease before its completion.

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Well, that's everything... let's see what we have.

BEE GEES
* 22 officially released studio albums
* 2 unauthorized (but still commercially available) studio albums
* 1 unreleased (but complete) official studio album
* 1 unreleased album not intended for public ears
* 2 officially released live albums
* 1 unauthorized (but still commercially available) live album
* 3 soundtracks with notable Bee Gees involvement
* 1 soundtrack with little Bee Gees involvement, but several older Gibb compositions (some of which aren't performed by the group themselves)
* 1 soundtrack with a couple new Bee Gees tracks, as well as other new Gibb compositions performed by different artists

BARRY
* 4 officially released demo albums
* 1 sort-of officially released demo album
* 2 officially released full-fledged studio albums (I'll put "Hawks" in here too)
* 1 unreleased (but complete) official studio album
* 1 unreleased album that was technically revised and released

ROBIN
* 6 officially released studio album
* 1 officially released live album
* 1 possibly forthcoming studio album
* 1 unreleased (but complete) official solo album
* 1 unreleased solo album that may not actually exist

MAURICE
* 1 officially released stage cast album, with other artists
* 2 unreleased (but complete) official solo albums (I'm putting "A Breed Apart" in here)
* 1 unreleased and probably unfinished solo album
* 1 unreleased and probably unfinished collaboration with Ringo Starr
* 1 unreleased soundtrack probably not planned for release

ANDY
* 3 officially released albums
* 1 unreleased (but complete) official solo album
* 1 unreleased and unfinished solo album

It wouldn't really be fair to tally these up, as it's impossible to say what should be included in the tally. One thing to remember, however, is that despite the general distinction between group and solo albums, the group actually tends to lump solo works (sometimes, but not always, including Andy's) together with group recordings - solo tracks have appeared on official Bee Gees compilations, for example, and the upcoming "Mythology" box even includes a disc of Andy material. So it's fair to say that most of not all of the above albums can be considered 'Bee Gees albums', even if they're not strictly such.

Total, the four brothers at least stamped their headlining names on an astounding *64* albums, but again, this is a very, very broad look at their wide body of recordings.

Incidentally, as a note for collectors, very few of these (despite the wealth of unreleased projects) are totally unavailable - much of the rare material is available in bootleg form somewhere. These are the items you shouldn't hold your breath for, because you won't find 'em:

• BEE GEES - third Australian album [in its entirety - "If I Needed Someone" and "Another Tear Falls" have never emerged into the collector's circuit]
  
• BARRY - "Guilty Pleasures Demos" [entire tracks - the bootleg CD contains the truncated versions!]
• ROBIN - "My Own Work"
• ROBIN - "50 St. Catherine's Drive" [what exists of it now, at least]
• MAURICE - untitled synthesizer album with Ringo
• MAURICE - "Strings and Things"
• ANDY - untitled Australian album
• ANDY - "It's My Neighborhood" (or "Man On Fire")

The Bee Gees' albums... how many? (part 2)

Okay, homework's done with, so where were we? Ah, that's right, I stopped after "Staying Alive". Alright, so it's the early Eighties, and the Bee Gees aren't making any music together....

...Well, actually, they are. Though it obviously won't count towards our number of group albums, Robin's solo album "Walls Have Eyes" was really a joint project between all three brothers, and indeed, his brothers are clearly heard on tracks like 'Toys'. But, nevermind that, because the boys officially reformed shortly after.

[17] E.S.P. (1987)
[18] ONE (1989)
[19] HIGH CIVILISATION (1991)
Three more studio albums added to their catalog. This era is notable, as it marked the loss of brother Andy - something discussed forthright on the "One" album.

[??] THE BUNBURY TAILS (1992)
And we hit a snag here. The Bunburys were a cartoon helmed by Bee Gees compatriot David English, with some input from Barry. I don't believe that I've actually seen this credited as a Bee Gees album anywhere, though a number of the tracks on this soundtrack were either performed by the group or written by the group for other artists. (Sadly, this obscure album is the only official home of No Hat Moon's performance of Barry's stunning "Seasons".) So, our choice is either to toss it in the "Melody" pile, since four of the Gibbs' six contributions are by other artists; or to put it in the "Staying Alive" pile, since the songs were all written for this soundtrack. I'll choose the latter. (Now, don't make me explain those piles, because I'll just end up confusing myself. Just slap this alongside the other various artists LP's mentioned and let's move on before someone's brain aches...)

[20] SIZE ISN'T EVERYTHING (1993)
[21] STILL WATERS (1997)
Two more studio albums. Incidentally, 1995 was meant to include the release of "Love Songs," a compilation for which the group recorded a handful of new tracks; this never emerged (and no, this wasn't the recent compilation of that title), and the new tracks appeared elsewhere.

[?] ONE NIGHT ONLY (1998)
Again, as with "Here At Last", this is a live album. But man, I almost feel bad having to relegate it to "miscellaneous" status, because it's so damn important - it marked a major tour in the Bee Gees' careers, and was accompanied by a video. But, I suppose it just all comes down to being the truncated soundtrack to a video, shorn of six songs in order to fit on a single disc.

[22] THIS IS WHERE I CAME IN (2001)
One last studio album for the trio... at this point, the boys were recording tracks separately ("White Album" style I suppose), and their growing conflicts would continue to boil, even beyond Maurice's death in 2003.

However, as of late 2009, Robin and Barry have reformed (as the Bee Gees), so there's always the possibility of a 23rd album.........

[?] AUSTRALIAN TOUR 1989 (2009)
Thought I should throw this last minute addition onto the pile. This commercially released two-disc set of the "One For All" tour was released without the brothers' permission, due to some copyright loophole in Australia that allows the unauthorized release of live recordings 20 years after recording takes place. This still seems fairly unknown by fans, but time will tell if the brothers give it any official notice.

============================

Alright, that covers the Bee Gees as a group.... now things get really ugly.

BARRY GIBB SOLO

[?] THE KID'S NO GOOD (1970)
See, here's why the solo projects get so ugly - because many of them were never released (or necessarily finished), so it's impossible to determine which should count and which shouldn't, since they obviously didn't inspire a release, no matter their state of completion. (More on that later.) This particular album, recorded during the Bee Gees' 1970 split, was finished. This was Barry's entry into a trio of solo albums that would be worked on, and scrapped, during that time period.

[1] GUILTY DEMOS (1979 / 2006)
[2] HEARTBREAKER DEMOS (1982 / 2006)
[3] EYES THAT SEE IN THE DARK DEMOS (1983 / 2006)
And then here's another issue. Alright, so, during the Bee Gees' post-Fever lull, Barry enjoyed writing entire albums for artists; and for each, he would record a private version of the entire album as a guideline for the respective artist. All of these were released on iTunes a couple years ago. So, after years of bootleg copies, they have entered the realm of released recordings - the only confusion lies in how to number them. Either they should be numbered according to recording chronology in relation to Barry's other albums, or they should be numbered based on their 2006 release. I'll leave that decision up to readers.

[4] NOW VOYAGER (1984)
The first Barry album to actually reach the market - well, Barry by himself, as he featured heavily on the artists' final versions of his demo recordings. This was accompanied by a short film showcasing the album's music.

[5] EATEN ALIVE DEMOS (1985 / 2006)
One more demo album, this time for Diana Ross. Unlike the others, this was never bootlegged; and the iTunes version is lacking the title track, the rights for which lay in the hands of its co-author, Michael Jackson.

[?] MOONLIGHT MADNESS (1986)
An unreleased album. I'm less apt to count this one, because much of the material would be recycled a couple years later on a similar LP. (Incidentally, this album is also sometimes referred to as "My Eternal Love.")

[6] HAWKS (1988)
And this is what became of "Moonlight Madness." That scrapped album was revamped as this movie soundtrack, all of which is performed by Barry, save "Chain Reaction" by Diana Ross (which was also a Gibb composition).

Well, that's all of Barry's solo albums, really.... except this little bit of confusion:

[?] GUILTY PLEASURES DEMOS (2005)
For the sequel to his 1979 project with Barbra Streisand, Barry wrote another album's worth of songs, and recorded an album's worth of demos (save "Don't Throw It All Away" and "Letting Go", which were previously released). So we can at least toss this in the 'unreleased' pile... or can we? Well, yes and no. Barry DID release these tracks, but not in any concrete form; their only appearance was in the 'Radio' stream on Barry's site, and there, they were intentionally faded in and out so that fans only heard two-minute-or-so chunks of them. Unless we see a full release someday (which may not occur, as Barry's iTunes days seem to be over), I won't count this.

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Off to bed I go... as soon as I can, I'll wrap this up. Robin's releases are fairly straightforward, Andy's have some interesting points, and as for Maurice... well, we'll see when I get there. His discography is a bit of a disaster.