"The Addams Family" - greatest video game ever?

Did you ever have a video game that you became so addicted to that no matter how many years passed since you first played it, you just couldn't let it go? I have one. "The Addams Family" for Genesis. And I say the Genesis one specifically, because the other versions of the same game just don't compare. (More on those later.)

I'm not sure how I got into this game - it probably caught my eye during a trip to Giant Eagle, as I remember renting it a ton. I've never actually *liked* the Addams Family movies or TV shows, but the vast, easy to explore world and the curiosity of where the next secret area may be hiding kept me endlessly entertained. I even remember writing a little storybook about it in first grade. (Wonder if I still have that somewhere, lame as it was...)

That's not to say that this was the only game I became mindlessly addicted to... but the other ones lost my interest after a while.* (I don't see myself playing "Forsaken" again anytime soon... but you know, on the other hand, that sounds tempting - I haven't played that in years!) I kept playing "The Addams Family" both on the Genesis itself and, eventually, on a Genesis emulator. Now, fifteen years later, I'm still finding stuff tucked away in there that I never knew about. And because the game *is* so vast and the levels are so varied, I never get tired of seeing them.

(* I should stop for a moment here, because I just remembered another extremely addictive game that I still play - "Toejam & Earl: Panic On Funkotron." The original "TJ&E" sucked in my opinion, but the sequel is one of the absolute best platformers for the Genesis. Shame no one ever seems to know about it.)

Being such a big fan of the game, I've been eager to try out the non-Genesis versions. The Game Boy and NES versions (both retitled "Pugsley's Scavenger Hunt" for some reason - and having no relation to the SNES game of that title) are both atrocious. the NES version especially. The graphics and music are extremely minimal, and several areas have been removed. The SNES version, on the other hand, is worth a look. It easily tops the Genesis version in terms of both graphics and music, using the system's capabilities to give the game a dark, moody, echoey atmosphere compared to the brighter Sega version; but of course, there are trade-offs. The gameplay is more frustrating, particularly the more difficult Wacky Scientist boss and the almost inevitable constant slamming of Gomez's head off the ceiling spikes in the freezer. I also don't find the Crypt levels as attractive on the SNES either; the backgrounds on the Genesis were more colorful and interesting compared to the blander, red-tinted backgrounds here. (On a final note, the game was also released for the Amiga, but I never played that version. From what I've seen, though, it's graphically bland and slow.)

Without cheats, I've gotten my completion time down to around 46 minutes; I'd be curious to see what other people have done, because I'm sure you could easily bounce from enemy to enemy and be done with an area in seconds if you had the practice. I find this to be the most efficient route to take, on the Genesis at least (since the harder SNES Wacky Scientist can be frustrating with only a couple hearts):

• When starting at the Addams Residence, go immediately through the door into the Hall of Stairs.
• Before doing *anything* else, go through the secret door on the bottom left of the Hall of Stairs, and navigate your way to The 1-Up Room. (It's the upper door in The Cloak Room.) You'll score about 25 1-Ups at once, which makes the game incredibly easy. Then, go back to the Hall of Stairs and start the journey proper...
  
• 1) The Big Tree - First heart. (Incidentally, the bird boss doesn't crap at you in the SNES version... dammit Nintendo!)
• 2) The Games Room - Save Pugsley from the Wacky Scientist. Remember, there's a hidden shortcut above the door at the end of the first level.
  
• 3) The Conservatory - In the first level, press the switch so you can get into the walled-off door. In the next area, when you see a door on a platform above you, use the bird to jump up there. You can get the second heart from the Centipedes.
• 4) The Crypt - After the heart, make your way through the Monster Garden and keep progressing through the Conservatory levels. You'll be in the Graveyard shortly - follow it to the Crypt and save Wednesday from the Ghastly Goblin.
• 5) Portrait Gallery / The Library - Fairly easy; four hearts should be enough. Save Fester from the Witch.
• 6) The Kitchen / The Freezer - Go to the left upon entering the Kitchen; you'll find the freezer through the Pantry. You'll find the last heart guarded by the Snowman.
• 7) The Kitchen / Granny's Stove - Now for the most frustrating part of the game. This is to the right in the kitchen; you'll need to find a switch to gain entry to the interior of Granny's stove. The areas inside are vast, but here's a very helpful tip - there's a secret tunnel above the exit to The Oven that will allow you skip several levels. You need to jump in from the ramp. (If you can't seem to get in, go back and hit the switch - it may be blocked.) At the end, you'll save Granny from the Fire Dragon.
  
• 8) The Music Room - Now, you can go through the middle door in the Hall, because Lurch unblocks the path beyond once all family members are safe. Move forward into the last set of levels.
• 9) The Chain Room / The Catacombs / Addams Vault - Navigating your way through the final areas shouldn't be hard; just make sure, in the chain areas, to avoid going down into the Pirahna Tank. At the very end, you'll face the Nasty Judge and free Morticia.

Alright, well, I'm off to look for cheat-free speed-runs. I need some pointers...

(Images from dotsis.com and coolrom.com.)

Why Sonic sucks now - an observation.

(Also known as "Le Horrible Destin d'Sonique le Hedgehog.")


Something occurred to me last night.

I think I've actually realized a reason Sonic the Hedgehog lost popularity - and the answer isn't just "Uh, 'cause every Sega console post-Genesis was garbage." Basically, it all comes down to the fact that people just can't cope with change - and this change was specifically brought about by the unavoidable switch to 3D. No matter the difficulty of any level in a standard 2D Sonic game, the strategy was always dead simple: always head to the right and you'll get out.

While some very rare occasions changed this (Scrap Brain 3 in "Sonic 1" requires you to exit upwards, but given that you're presented with about seven springs in a row, if you can't figure that out, you don't deserve to be playing the game in the first place), the exit has ALWAYS been located at the rightmost point of the level. Some levels were linear and kept pushing you in the right direction, but in levels that made you go to the left or up or down, your first instinct was always to get to a place where you could go right again. There weren't even secret exits off the beaten path - there was *one* signpost (or boss), and it was always at the far right of the area.

But when did this simplistic design all start to go downhill? "Sonic 3D Blast." The comfortable, 2D view of the right side of Sonic was replaced by an awkward 3/4 view (ooh, Graphic Design term!), and the exit was SOMEWHERE in this polygonal, blocky area... but where exactly it was wasn't at all clear, because *it wasn't to the right*. Not only that, but most exits weren't even exits - most just took you elsewhere in the level, thus rendering our handy, lone signpost obsolete. Oh, and you couldn't just happily prance your little blue self through these exits - you went through when you were *allowed* to go through. Unless you made buddies with a bunch of little annoying birds, the exit was useless.

It shouldn't come as a surprise that the most popular Sonic games nowadays aren't fancy 3D ones where Sonic turns into a werewolf (oh, I'm sorry, "werehog"), or those dark, emo Shadow the Hedgehog things... they're games like "Sonic Advance" and "Sonic Rush". Why? Because *those* are the types of games we're used to! Sonic runs in a straight line and the exit is at the far right! They throw as many gimmicks in there as possible (one of the "Sonic Advance" games has a level made of musical instruments that play when you touch them, for instance), but no matter how many gimmicks they throw in, the exit is at the far right. You can *never* say that you're permanently lost, because you know how to get out before you even see the level!

OK, case in point - the one Sonic level that the most people claim to get lost in is Sandopolis 2, in "Sonic and Knuckles." It's dark, it's vast, it's frustrating - and there's incredibly irritating ghosts. And what part of that level do people complain about the most? The section where you have to jump from one sand slide to the other. People don't know what to do. But look closely, because the answer is obvious: the slide you start out on takes you nowhere, because it's taking you *to the left*. The slide that actually advances you in the level takes you *to the right*. Don't slide back and forth for ten minutes and get frustrated (which happens) - get on the one that's going to the right! You should know by now that no matter what obstacles lie beyond the end of that slide, the exit will be obvious at some point if you just keep going in that direction. It's not going to change - even the upside down level (Death Egg 2), despite often making you go to the left, ends to the right.

So in a nutshell, a reason so many post-"Sonic and Knuckles" games are just considered crap on ice are because they frustrate us, all because they break one very simple convention. We want to go right, not 160 degrees to the left, over a building, through a loop, 75 degrees right, over a tree, etcetera, etcetera. Keep Sonic's blue ass out of view and keep him facing sideways!

That's my two cents.